unify deprecated/unsafe lifecycle warnings, pass tests (#16103)

- redoes #15431 from scratch, taking on the feedback there
- unifies the messaging between "deprecated" and UNSAFE_ lifecycle messages. It reorganizes ReactStrictModeWarnings.js to capture and flush all the lifecycle warnings in one procedure each.
- matches the warning from ReactPartialRenderer to match the above change
- passes all the tests
- this also turns on `warnAboutDeprecatedLifecycles` for the test renderer. I think we missed doing so it previously. In a future PR, I'll remove the feature flag altogether.
- this DOES NOT do the same treatment for context warnings, I'll do that in another PR too